Tools Supporting Personal Development and Community
Incentives Living in a community accelerates personal development through resolution of the inevitable conflicts that will occur. No matter how similar our values are with our housemates, we are all sufficiently unique. It’s these differences that will require us to work out compromises that involve personal development for each of us. Next, the 411 community is about supporting and inspiring each other’s quest for healthy and planet-friendly lives. We each have distinct gifts to offer and needs, and we can enrich each other by giving and taking – which increases our capacity to give and receive love, sometimes tough love. Finally, the 411 community is about increased safety. As we get to know each other we can better look out for each other’s possessions, pets and guests. When a stranger appears on the property we think to ask if he or she needs help.
The Landlord’s Role: First, Bob’s job is to assure that the beautiful common areas are well-maintained and attractive places for residents to visit with each other and their guests. These areas include the Great Room on the first floor of the carriage house apartment, our porch, sundeck, grounds, mail room, bike shed, laundry room, etc. Second, Bob’s job is to seek applicants who appreciate the opportunity to live in a community-oriented house and have gifts that might enrich the house community. Third, it’s Bob’s job to introduce residents to each other via email, the 411 Contacts Sheet and the monthly house suppers. Finally, in cases where residents have tried but failed to resolve conflicts, Bob can serve as a mediation option with the understanding that he can – as a last resort – ask a resident to leave the community per the terms in his or her rental agreement.
Residents’ Role: First, you can clarify to yourself and then to your housemates the level of community that interests you at 411. To obtain the full benefits of community, make an effort to get to know your housemates including their passions and most-frequent guests. Share similarly with them. Take advantage of the opportunity at the monthly house suppers to tell your story to a group that is listening intently and lovingly. And offer such listening when others are telling their stories. Be in touch with your needs, expectations and boundaries – and communicate these to your housemates. (Don’t expect housemates to be able to read your mind about what is a big deal to you!) When conflicts occur, see this as an opportunity to grow and work the conflicts out – before seeking a housemate outside the conflict to mediate. Expressing anger or blame for a boundary that hasn’t been communicated is not helpful and can cause unnecessary turmoil. If your conflict is with Bob, open yourself to mediation support from a housemate you and he both view as neutral in the conflict. If your conflict is with the entire house, the house email group or the monthly advisory committee meeting is usually the better place for this sharing than the house text group. Be open to discussion and compromise on how to meet everyone’s needs.
Covenant of Right Relations: We agree to 1) cultivate speaking with care and listening attentively 2) recognize that we will have differing opinions 3) speak from our own experience rather than hearsay 4) trust in one another’s good intentions but realize that our actions may still have a negative impact 5) communicate our discomfort directly when we are hurt by another or when we inadvertently hurt another 6) resolve conflicts through compromise and collaboration and when necessary request mediation support as noted above.
Internet at 411: Thanks to a commercial grade Fidium service, there is strong Wi-Fi throughout 411 including the patio, porch and sundeck. Report any internet problems to our internet wizard, presently Josh. Let him decide whether to unplug the modem or router – as it takes a full 10 minutes to reboot.
Regular Monthly House Supper and Meeting: We aim for the first Sunday of the month. The usual time is 5:00 pm for appetizers, social time and prep time, 6:00 pm for circling around the buffet with grace. We begin the sharing of personal stories soon after everyone is seated with their food. Sometimes this is an opportunity to tell your housemates what you might help them and what you might need help with. Other times the opportunity is to reflect on your dominant feeling this month or day, and what’s going on in your life that contributes to this dominant feeling. Some months you might want to pass, and that’s fine too. You are urged to attend the monthly house suppers and, if you cannot attend, you are encouraged to share via email something about your life
Scheduled Use of Porch/Yard or Carriage House Living Room for Special Events: These areas are for shared common use by all residents. It is assumed you are in a social but quiet mood when you use these areas. If you want to schedule a private party in one of these areas, coordinate with Bob who keeps the calendar. Because the Great Room is the “through’ room for carriage house residents, only non-confidential and “non-raucous” events can be scheduled there. The event coordinator (or someone designated by the coordinator) is responsible for cleaning up after the event and returning furnishings including dishes, etc., to their zero positions.
Chore Team Responsibilities (See 411 Middle Street Maintenance Assignments): All residents have agreed to work an average of three hours per month. More is appreciated but not expected. Non-compliance is grounds for being asked to leave.
When Away Overnight, Consider Renting Out Your Bedroom for a Housemate’s Guest: Do this by emailing the house distribution list to let your housemates know exactly when you are leaving and when you are returning. Choose a price that makes it an attractive option for them to offer it to a guest of theirs and explain how you want to handle bed linens and towels. Remember you want it to be an attractive package yet worthwhile for you to do as well. Start with $20 – $40 per night and over time you will know if your pricing works. If you have a guest visiting, you can email the house list to see if someone is planning to be away and might be lured to rent out his or her bedroom to you.
Tools for Supporting Extraordinary Health
During the Pandemic: We were blessed during the pandemic to have a physician and three nurses residing at 411 who were willing to develop and implement protocols to protect housemates from getting the Covid-19 virus and for self-quarantining when someone tested positive. These protocols reflected current CDC and the New Hampshire Governor’s guidelines and changed when their guidelines changed.
Bob’s Personal Passions: Bob is a trained spiritual counselor, long-time yoga teacher (28 years!), raw vegan chef and Hippocrates Health Educator – and is available for coaching sessions at no charge for housemates. For years, Bob taught a monthly raw vegan food preparation class which morphed into a monthly raw vegan potluck in the great room. In the winters of 2020 and 2022, Bob did a month-long water fast at the Tanglewood Wellness Center in Costa Rica where he was inspired to eat mostly raw fruits (including tomatoes, avocadoes, cucumbers and peppers) and tender leafy greens.
Bob’s Plea for a Vegan Diet:
“Nothing will benefit human health and increase chances for survival of life on Earth as much as the evolution to a vegetarian diet.” – Albert Einstein
Throughout history there have been advocates for man to eat a plant-based diet and stop systemic violence toward animals. These luminaries include Socrates, Pythagoras, Jesus, Buddha, Leonardo da Vince, Shakespeare and Gandhi. In the United States, we have Ralph Waldo Emerson, Susan B. Anthony, Rosa Parks, and many others. But not my family. My grandfather became a stay-at-home husband after his bout with polio forced him to leave his factory job. He would frequent the local meat market for free scraps of meat and bones to flavor his daily tomato sauce. My father considered it a sign of making it into the middle class that we could eat steak rather than pasta and beans. My mother made her culinary mark by creating desserts in which she’d double the sugar in the recipes to make them more popular. The result is that I was fatigued, overweight and acned; and I developed a lifelong addiction to sweets. My physical health required that I leave all this behind and now my spirit calls me to bring what I’ve learned to you. In my 20s, I began a gradual 50-year progression toward veganism, that is, a 100% whole foods plant-based diet; and the closer I adhere to just fruit and tender leafy greens, the better I feel. My life would be so much easier if I believed this diet works for me because of my blood type, or my ayervedic body classification, or my specific genes. Then I could simply ask you to tolerate it. Instead, I am pleading that you embrace the possibility that a plant-based diet is imperative for all humans. You see I believe that each animal species on the earth has an optimal species-specific diet that best serves its biology. And for human beings this is plants and not animal products. Our closest primate relatives – who are a 95% DNA match to humans – eat this diet and do not suffer from protein deficiency, heart disease or cancer. Our jaws and teeth are perfect for eating fruit, vegetables and beans – and are so unlike the jaws and teeth of carnivores which are suited to kill and eat animals. Our long intestines are perfect for digesting and absorbing fruits, vegetables and beans but the long length results in the putrification of animal flesh. Carnivores have much shorter intestines which allow animal flesh to pass through quickly without putrification. Our hands are great for harvesting fruit without implements, compared with the claws of carnivores which are perfect for capturing the specific animals they should eat. Finally, our earliest childhood inclination toward fruit and animals was to eat the fruit and to pet and cuddle animals. High in saturated fat and cholesterol, the flesh, eggs and milk of animals strain our digestion, acidify our blood, clog our arteries and inflame our intestines. Along with processed foods, this diet is causing our growing health crisis. Independent science – that is, studies not funded by the food industries – have found significant correlations between diets high in animal products and our chronic diseases including heart disease, cancer, obesity, diabetes, arthritis, etc. Studies also show declines in health as countries shift from plant-based diets to diets high in processed foods and animal products. High-performing vegan athletes disprove the myth that we need animal protein to build muscles and calcium from cows’ milk to build bones. For example, world-record-breaking weight lifter Patrick Baboumian, and 9 times Olympic gold medalist Carl Lewis, claim their performance improved when they switched to a vegan diet. The capture, herding and confinement of animals for food was justified on the miss-guided notion that animals are inferior to humans. Historians believe that these confined animals were the first capital over which families and groups of families fought – with the winners enslaving both the animals and the members of the losing families. Over centuries, slavery was similarly justified on the miss-guided notion that one race is inferior to another – resulting in slaves being treated no better than animals. This is yet another reason why I believe the herding of animals for food was such a grievous crime against humanity. On factory farms we cram animals into toxic and stressful situations and force them to eat foods they would never eat in the wild. Their resulting ill-health breeds dangerous bacteria and viruses. As we increase the doses of antibiotics in their feed, we enable more resistant strains – a formula for epidemics and possibly pandemics. So there is an enormous public health opportunity in shifting to a plant-based or vegan diet. The raising of animals for our food is far more disastrous to our environment than commonly acknowledged. A conservative estimate is that animal agriculture requires 15 times more land, water and petroleum than plant based agriculture. This means we could feed 15 times more people a healthier plant-based diet using the resources we now devote toward systemic violence toward animals. Every day we are destroying 90K acres of Brazil’s rainforests and 10K acres of forests in the United States to accommodate our voracious appetite for meat. Most of this land is converted to monocrops to fatten animals – destroying in the process countless species of plants and wild animals. The water crisis in our western states would be nonexistent if we switched to a plant-based diet. It’s estimated that one pound of California beef requires over 5K gallons of water to produce – whereas one pound of California fruit and vegetables requires a mere 24 gallons. The world’s confined livestock operations are polluting our streams and oceans from the massive runoff of minimally-regulated animal waste, toxic pesticides and chemical fertilizers. Animal agriculture also contributes more greenhouse gasses than all of the world’s transportation vehicles combined – including cars, trucks, planes and ships! Economic inequality is bolstered by our appetite for and addiction to the flesh, eggs and milk of animals. Poor people especially lose out when the resources that could be devoted to their growing their own food are used for crops for animal feed – as most of the animal produce in the poorer countries is exported to wealthier countries. An outrageous consequence is that a billion people in the wealthier countries suffer from diseases of dietary excess – while a billion people in the poorer countries are under-nourished – with some 30K people dying every day due to hunger. By paying for and eating animal products, we enable and are complicit in systemic cruelty toward animals which is carefully hidden from our view. Here are two sample stories: Dairy Cows: In the wild, a lactating cow and her nursing calf are protected from humans and other animals by a fearsome bull who knows that the calf is the rightful recipient of her milk. Humans are the only specie on the planet that drinks the milk of another animal – made possible by our exploitation. A female calf determined to become a dairy cow is removed from her mother prematurely so as not to “waste” her mother’s marketable milk. She is then subjected to painful dehorning, tail docking and the removal of extra teats that might interfere with electric milking machines. Whereas in the wild she would not be ready to be pregnant for 3 – 5 years, in our animal factories, she is fed hormones to come into heat when less than a year old. And, while restrained, she is inseminated by a sperm gun fired deep into her vagina. Soon after giving birth, she squeals in protest when her baby is taken away and she is hooked up to a milking machine three times a day. Soon again she is re-inseminated thereby lactating and pregnant simultaneously. This process repeats for some 3 – 5 years when her health is so deteriorated, despite the massive use of antibiotics, that she is trucked off to a slaughterhouse – and forced to bleed to death hanging upside down by one leg. In the wild, she could live easily for another 15 years. Given that my last name, Vaccaro, means cow farmer in Italian, it’s ironic that I never grasped the level of cow cruelty enabled by our desires for cheese, ice cream and other dairy products. Hens: In the wild, a hen will create a private setting to birth her precious eggs, and protectively sit on them until they hatch. In egg factories, she is debeaked without anesthesia and then so squished into small wire cages with several other hens that she cannot even open her wings. Her feet become deformed as she clutches the wires in the slanted floor. When she births an egg it rolls away onto a conveyor belt – frustrating her desire to sit on it. The cages are stacked several high so that she is continuously bombarded by poop from above and the piles of poop below create stench for miles around. She is so pushed to produce eggs, that by the time she is at the end of her egg-laying cycle, her tortured body has so little flesh that she is slaughtered for low-grade meat used in chicken soup and pet food. The flesh of grass-fed cows and free-range cows and chickens are less laden with antibiotics and hormones, but these meats are still high in saturated fat and cholesterol – as well as the terror of premature slaughter. So, what about fish? Fish have pain receptors like other animals and thereby also suffer when caught and killed for food As our rivers and oceans are increasingly polluted by the runoff from animal agriculture and other industries, the flesh and oils of fish store toxic substances – including pharmaceuticals, plastics and heavy metals – in concentrations thousands of times greater than the waters they inhabit. This is because fish literally breathe water continuously. The most toxic fish are imprisoned in commercial fish farms – also laden with fecal matter and antibiotics. Our over-fishing drastically reduces the ocean’s capacity to self-clean – as exquisitely executed by fish. Especially problematic are the commercial trawlers whose huge nets haul up all the creatures in their path – a third of these creatures are thrown back, severely damaged; and another third are added to the unnatural feed for animals on factory farms. In the United States, more fish is fed to cows than to humans. It’s well documented that slaughterhouse workers, who are asked to kill some 75 million animals daily in the United States, suffer traumatic disorders and higher-than-average rates of suicide, domestic abuse and other crimes. By paying for and eating the flesh of these slaughtered animals, we are complicit in the suffering of these workers as well as the animals. A happiness tracking company recently polled 11,500 North Americans and reported that vegans are statistically happier than meat eaters. It’s possible that this is because vegans are healthier. However, I believe it’s also because vegans know they are respecting the worth and dignity of animals in the interdependent web of all existence. And they know that animals have feelings, personalities, and unique and mysterious instincts – no different from our pets! No one likes to be told what to eat. However, the reason we eat animal products is because we were told to do so by our families since we were toddlers. I certainly was. And our families’ instructions were and still are reinforced, not by independent science, but by studies paid for by the largest, and possibly most subsidized, industry in our country – the animal food industry – which profits from our buying and eating their products. Their studies typically rave about the protein and other nutrients in their animal-based products but ignore our bodies’ incapacity to properly digest and absorb these nutrients. Western medicine, controlled by the second largest industry in our country, the pharmaceutical industry, thrives on selling drugs that “treat” the chronic illnesses of both humans and confined animals. For example, over 75% of the antibiotics sold by the pharmaceutical giants end up in animal feed. Unfortunately for us, these drugs “manage” these illnesses by suppressing symptoms, rather than curing the underlying causes. More than half my aging friends and relatives are on such medications “for life” – a lousy sentence for us but a goldmine for pharmaceutical sales and profits. This is why we cannot expect western medicine to challenge and rescue us from the animal foods that keep us chronically ill and thereby keep big pharma enormously profitable. This rescue must be our calling. I began my shift to a plant-based diet to heal my body. Learning about the benefits to the environment deepened that commitment. However, it was learning how our raising animals for food so violates their natural instinctual purposes that called me to write this essay. I want you to shift to a plant-based diet because I care for you and want you to live a healthier, longer and happier life. By changing what we eat, we also have the power of our wallets to promote a monumental shift toward a kinder society. And we will be supporting – and be supported by – activists for personal health, public health, the environment, social justice, and animal liberation. Most of us do not have the wealth to start foundations or fund lobbyist groups, or the oratorical skill to change the minds of our countrymen. Or the time and inclination to join activist groups. But we do buy food every week and eat two or three meals every day. That means every day, two or three times a day we have an opportunity to do something good for ourselves, the environment, social justice and animals. Any meal can become a celebration of compassion, freedom and hope. If we were just interested in our physical health, diet would be one of several pillars to consider – along with exercise, community, sleep, sunlight, clean water and air, positive thoughts, and finding our purpose. However, when we factor in the relationship of a plant-based diet to planetary health, social justice and animal well-being, the relative importance of a plant-based diet is extraordinary. My plea is to embrace the possibility that we can change what we eat. I’m not implying this is an easy change. But the alternative – chronic illness, pain, a shortened life, and the knowledge of our impact on the environment and animals – is also not easy. In this age of internet research, vegan recipes are easy to find on-line as well as in our local libraries and book stores. We can start with small steps – maybe one meal a week – either replacing an animal product with a plant-based whole food, or simply leaving out the animal product. There are signs that a shift to a whole foods plant-based diet is in the works and gaining steam. But to reach a tipping point, we need ordinary folk like you and me – to jump on board. Margaret Mead said it well: “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world; indeed it’s the only thing that ever has.”
Use of the Carriage House Raw Vegan Kitchen Equipment: This kitchen is equipped with two top-of-the-line tools for raw vegan food preparation: a Cuisinart Food Processor and a VitaMix Blender. All 411 housemates are welcome to use these appliances respectfully in support of moving you in the raw vegan direction – but only during our non- quiet hours of 7 am – 11 pm. Other carriage house kitchen appliances are not available to non carriage house mates except for a special event. (If you need to borrow an item from this kitchen, please return it within hours, not days!)
All-House Water Filters: In April of 2017, we installed two all-house water filters: a carbon filter that removes organic chemicals and chlorine; and a softener to remove pesky minerals including lead, copper, calcium, magnesium, iron and other heavy metals. The resulting filtered water requires less soaps, detergents and shampoos. Please note that this filtered water is slippier in tubs and showers, so you might want to consider rubber pads.
Far Infrared Sauna: Our sauna uses far infrared rays that are the part of sunlight that generates the warmth we feel on sunny days. These rays penetrate your skin and excite blood vessels, improve circulation, reduce inflammation, help to relieve nerve pain and improve overall wellbeing. They address a wide range of issues from skin blemishes to scar tissue.
Guidelines for Infrared Sauna Use:
- Turn the sauna on by pressing the on/off button – ideally 15 – 30 minutes before you enter so it is comfortably warm. The clock will automatically time-down from 60 minutes and the temperature will automatically start climbing to 150 degrees. Do not adjust these settings. The current temperature takes a minute to register.
- Sign in on log located on the piano – under today’s date with name and turn-on time so the next user can estimate about when you will be finished. If someone is ahead of you, sign in after the current user’s name so he or she can notify you when finished.
- Bring in two towels – one to sit on and one for under your feet and take these towels out with your sweat when you leave. Some clothing is required but can be as skimpy as a towel or underwear.
- Either sip plenty of water before entering the sauna or bring water in with you. Sip, not gulp the water. Do not use the sauna if you have been drinking alcohol.
- Once in the sauna, re-start the sauna so as to re-start the clock time-down to 60 minutes. Stay in at least long enough to break a sweat, but no more than 60 minutes. Start with say 30 minutes and build gradually.
- If the temperature is uncomfortably hot for you, crack the door a bit to let some heat out, rather than turning off the sauna. This keeps the extraordinarily-healing infrared rays going.
- When done, turn off the sauna even though there is someone signed up to begin after you. Check the pad and if there is someone signed up after you, notify that person that you are done.
- Consider a cold shower immediately after the sauna (amazing benefit!), but use your shower rather than the one in the front hall.
Tools for Planet-Friendly Living
Solar Panels and Pellet Boiler In 2012, we replaced our entire aging slate roof with a look-like-slate roofing shingle approved by Portsmouth’s Historic District Commission. This paved the way the following year to install 61 solar panels on our three southerly facing roofs. These panels provide electricity to all the common areas as well as to Apartments 3, 4 and 8. In 2018, we installed a wood pellet boiler for heating all the apartments except the carriage house apartment (which is heated by one natural gas stove in the great room) and for heating the hot water in all the apartments. Wood pellets are a local non-fossil fuel that is a by-product of the Northeast wood and paper industry.
Individual Radiator Thermostats to Conserve Pellets: Except for the carriage house apartment, every radiator in the building has a state-of-art local thermostat to regulate hot water flow into that radiator. This allows you to turn the thermostat dial clockwise all-the-way off in the summer and shoulder months and when you are away for any overnight trips. During heating months, you can turn the thermostat down to the lowest number you are comfortable with. For most of the radiators the number 2 position a good place to start. Turning counterclockwise, the higher the number the higher the temperature. Since during the heating season the water in the heating system is always hot, the radiator will heat up quickly when turned up. In the carriage house apartment, the thermostat is to the left of the gas stove is best left at one temperature nay and night – typically 65 degrees.
Recycling and Composting:
Creating as little landfill waste as possible is important to us; and we support Portsmouth’s recycling rules. Use the three large recycling bins to the right of the carriage house door for corrugated board, paper board, paper, glass, plastic (numbers 1-7), and metal. Use the short compost bin under the stove vent in the bike shed for all food scraps including animal products, eggshells, bread, shells, paper napkins, paper plates, tea bags, coffee grounds and filters, fruit pits, compostable cups, utensils, plates, etc. Use the four medium-size trash cans in the bike shed for all other trash. Plastic bags and garbage bags are not permitted by the City in the recycling bins – even if they are full of recyclables. If you use plastic bags to store your recyclables, empty the bags into the recycling bins and put the plastic bags in the trash bins or bring them to a grocery store that recycles plastic bags. On the other hand, plastic bags work great for storing trash as this helps keep loose items from caking up the bins. All eight bins are brought to the street by the house trash manager on Wednesday evening after 5:00 – for Thursday morning pickup. The house trash manager tracks the few exceptions when a holiday falls on Thursday. If you have a large amount of recyclables or trash due to spring cleaning or moving, bring out extra bins from the bike shed or basement on Wednesday evening – instead of filling the bins Thursday after they are just emptied. The City picks up the recycling and trash bins early on Thursday and Mister Fox picks up the compost bin generally late in the day.
Support for Shifting to a Plant-Based Diet: Probably the most significant thing one can do to lead a healthy and planet-friendly life is to shift to a whole foods plant-based diet. The raising of animals for food uses more energy than transportation and heating combined, contributes enormously to greenhouse gasses, soil degradation, water pollution, and condones animal brutality and the spread of many of our diseases. At 411, you will be supported in this shift, baby step by baby step if that’s your wish.
Lights On/Off Policy: In 2016 we switched the common area light bulbs to LEDs which, though expensive upfront, use minimal electricity and last for decades. For safety reasons there are several lights we keep on 24/7. These include the front hall wall light, the light by the basement door, the light beside the door to Apt 6A; and in the carriage house the lights by the stairs and over the round counter. The outside front and mail room lights, the outside side-door light and the light over the carriage house front door by the bike shed should be left on all night but turned off during the day. All other common area lights should be turned off when not in use — like you would do in your home. If you leave or walk through a common area after 11 pm, please turn off any lights not on the 24/7 list.
Storm Windows and A/C Use: In windows which you want to use the screens, push the storm window all the way up (for looks) and use the inside window to regulate how much air you want. During heating season, please keep storm windows closed and screens down. This gives the house a more uniform look. If you crack open your windows during heating season, make sure your radiator is off and the door to your room or apartment is closed. If you must use A/C during the summer, limit use to times when you are home and your door is closed. An exception can be made for pets if the A/C is on low. The fan in your A/C draws much less power and doesn’t need to be limited.